If your search was conducted by an agency or a confidential intermediary, you will have few options regarding how initial contact is made...and, in some cases, may not even be able to choose the locale for the initial meeting.

Due to legal concerns and a very narrow interpretation of Illinois Adoption Statutes, most adoption agencies will not provide adoptees and birth parents with identifying information unless both parties have signed a waiver of confidentiality or registered with the agency Registry. Under Illinois law, if an agency has received a waiver of confidentiality from both a birth parent and the adoptee, they are required to release identifying information to both parties on request. But that doesn't seem to keep some agencies from subjecting searching triad members to mandatory counseling, psychological evaluation (to "make sure" the person is "ready for the search") and other intimidating procedures. Be sure to inquire about your agency's policies with regard to the release of identifying information before hiring them to do your search.

Those searching through an agency may find it frustrating to be relegated to such a passive role and to have so little input in the reconnection process. Some agencies will, on request, forward written correspondence for searching adoptees and birth parents, but most usually contact the unknown birth relative on the searching party's behalf...and relay the results of the search by phone or letter.

There have been numerous cases where agencies have reported that an adoptee or birth parent has declined contact when, in fact, the birth relative was never contacted by the agency (e-mail or call us for specifics or to report fradulent agency activities).  Annoyingly, there is no accountability for agency search programs...and, disappointingly, not all agencies can be trusted to conduct their search programs fairly and honestly. If you suspect that the agency you've hired is not providing the service for which you paid them, please contact us for assistance.

Intermediaries for the state of Illinois can only search for and locate a birth relative to obtain medical background information for an adoptee; they do not arrange contact. Identities of those searching for and located by a confidential intermediary are usually exchanged through the Illinois Adoption Registry and Medical Information Exchange (IARMIE) or the International Soundex Reunion Registry (ISRR). Once you've received notification of a match from the IARMIE or the ISRR, you can initiate contact via phone or letter (see those sections for additional info on these options).

The White Oak Foundation maintains extensive data on agency post-adoption services.  All those searching through an agency post-adoption program are encouraged to share both positive and negative agency experiences with us...Your feedback will help us advise other searching triad members...and gauge the efficiency of various agencies' programs.